Blatheration

R.I.P. Dolly

The happiest dog in the world has passed on to her reward.  Dolly Jean Dogger departed this mortal coil at 3:20 yesterday after a long and frustrating battle with cancer.  Her remains were interred on the family compound at the base of a mulberry tree.

She will be sorely missed.

And they lived happily ever after...

Congratulations to #1 Son and his brand new bride, Kathy Lou.  The knot was tied (and then splice d for added security by Mrs. Doclee) on Saturday in beautiful Eureka Springs, Arkansas.  The bride's gown was a lovely white silk affair which was cleverly cut in such a way as to make the hump almost unnoticeable. The Groom and his Best Man "Steve" both wore black tuxedos with white shirt and tie and almost no stains of any kind.  The Maid of Honor was some noisy blond chick.  Unfortunately for all, the event was planned as an outdoor event.  In February.  Good move, wedding planner.  In fact, the "minister" did not even bother to remove her coat, but was mercifully brief.  

The reception was held at the Lee family compound which had been lavishly decorated by Mrs. Doclee over the preceeding 48 hours. All the usual suspects were present, including a suprise visit by Mr. and Mrs. Big Al and their three very quiet sons.  The surprise was that previously Mr. Big Al has never ever been where he was supposed to be on time.   The next 48 hours will most likely be spent picking tiny pieces of confetti out of the carpet.  

Now we await the grandchildren.  I hope Mrs. Doclee explained that they have to take a break from "Rock Band" in order to accomplish that particular task.

In other news, Mr. Grizzlebaar and his lovely bride were here for a visit during the week.  Much talking, eating and drinking (and smoking illegal Cuban cigars...Thanks again Mr. Grizzlebaar) was done.  Not so much sleeping, though.  So ends one of the longest weeks in recent memory.  I shall return soon.

Tree death in the Ozarks

I wonder what the neighbors would have thought (had they been able to see past the security fence) had they seen Beam Builder Billy and I on out knees, blowing into the base of a tree stump?  Anyway, before anyone starts spreading rumors, I shall clarify:  We were trying to set the stump on fire.

The stump had, just minutes before been a looming and foreboding threat to our very existence, or at least my roof, so Operation Stihl was executed to save us from near certain disaster (or at least from scraping up my new architectural shingles).  Originally, the plan had been to just "prune" back a couple of branches that had been weakened by the recent ice storm, but as you well know, a chainsaw is a greedy tool, so the entire tree...and another...and most of another were committed to a future in the firewood industry.  Except for the Mulberry, which will continue to sacrifice itself in slow death as decorative knife handles and hair clip bowls.

Having noticed that the original tree had been rotting from the inside out, the cavity was filled with gasoline and set alight, which was entertaining, but not long lived since the wood was mostly green. Sharp eyed Billy found a secret passage under the stump which communicated with said cavity which constituted a natural, albeit small, fireplace.  So, we have wood, we have a built in chimney...we have gasoline.  Excellent.  What followed was two hours of blowing on kindling in an attempt to reach whatever the flashpoint is of a green Box-elder stump.  The tree won round one (also two and three), but I will have my revenge.  I will not pay Stumpy's tree grinding service.  Not this time.

  In engine news, the pistons are now ringed.  Did you know what there is a tool for installing them?  (technology, what a concept) I always used the thumbs, thoug that is a bit hard on the delicate tissues.  The cam is installed, and since I have decided to forego the luxury of new con-rod bolts, engine assembly should be complete by the end of the week.  Still nothing to put it in. Maybe Mrs. Doclee would like to use it as a coffee table.  Mario Andretti has one and he's Italian.

Newness

New toy:

That's right.  2-ton capacity.  Engine assembly has commenced.  It even folds up for E-Z storage.  

In related news.  Ed the body man has actually begun work on my truck.  That is to say that the vehicle is now inside the building.  At this rate, I should be able to pay him off with my first Social Security check.

Progress on the seat is somewhat slower in that the seat is exactly where I left it and has not been moved. Nor has the material been ordered.  This is the price one must pay for top notch craftsmanship. 

Photos will be made available as soon as Mrs. Doclee figures out where she put the *^$% camera.  

Happy Chinese Lantern Festival

Yeah, I have a calender.  It even has cute Labrador puppies on it.  Every Month.  You're envious, aren't you?

Update on "El Trucko" project:  None.  Ed, the body man is still convieniently out of electricity and is using that as an excuse to delay progress.  Charley the machinist has finished the awesome 390 and is patiently waiting on me to come by and pick up all the parts and I will...as soon as I have a pickup.  Damn ice storms. The good news is that the new transmission has emptied it's 12 quarts of precious bodily fluids all over the garage floor, so it will be lighter and therefore more efficient.  I think.

Sadly, this thing is not going to be done before my next exciting desert adventure, which will begin in just a few weeks, barring congressional and/or psychiatric action.  I will explain:  If congress decides that I should be offered a commission, they will offer it and I will most likely accept it.  I will then have to enter a different training pipeline and have to stay here to do it.  If I don't accept it, I should have my head examined.  Little Cat A and Little Cat B have grown used to me though, so I hate to send them on along without me.  All will be made clear within a few weeks. I know.  I can't wait either.

Another tragedy averted

Miss Crabgrass has lived to wreck another day, having convinced the Good Neighbor^r 

man that she will indeed be a good risk far into the future.  Heh, sucker.  

We have managed to clear up all the limbs, sticks, nests and squirrel corpses littering the property.  All that remains is raking, but some of us have drill this weekend, so Mrs. Doclee will have that privilege.She's so lucky.  She could be stuck in a hot room with a hundred or so sweaty men having their brains turned to jelly with powerpoint presentations on such exciting topics as "understanding the desert environment" (short version:  It's really hot and everything there is trying to kill or maim you).  Then there's the ever popular "prevention of heat injury" (Edited version:  "Drink water").  And let us not forget the memorable "Proper handling of enemy personnel and equipment" (again, too easy:  "Security round")  Actually, that would be a war crime, so make sure there aren't any CNN crews around.  Just kidding.  The correct procedure is to shut them up and pawn them off on the intel weenies.  That way you can get back to your "mission planning".  If you don't have Guitar Hero , you can always do Halo.  I hear it is the "bomb".

Before I forget, here's a fun link:  Cute animals

Back Monday.

Motivation

This is way better than those sappy "Together we can accomplish anything" posters.

 

Are you motivated now?  Excellent.

In other news, Miss Crabgrass has graced us with her presence for a few days.  No, no, not to bond with her parents, but to go before The Man (insurance man, that is) and beg forgiveness for her recent failings as a motorist.  The Good Neighbor^R would like to know why they should continue to subsidize her motorized multitasking mayhem.  Actually, I would like to know the answer to that one too.  Not that I'm on the side of the insurance industry, but $17,000 in payouts on two years of premiums does beg the question.  Perhaps they will take the tough love approach.  I'm willing to bet that cuteness on her part will not melt the heart of an industry whose every dollar is their favorite child.  We shall see.

I am scheduled to attend a special performance by Dr. VanDyke.  I think I'm getting some kind of award.  I showed up with a broken tooth a while back and must have been the millionth customer or something, because now I get a crown.  Am I lucky or what?

Tragicness ends

With the exception of a few days of interrupted internetage and a day without power, we here at the compound have gotten through Mother Nature's latest tantrum relatively unscathed.  The folks South of town have not been so lucky and are expected to be out of electricity (except the homemade kind) for another two weeks or so.  

Please note the addition of fine advertisers to this site.  Please go to their sites and buy whatever they are selling.  Lots of it.  Tell your friends to do the same.  Then I can just watch the crazy 'Blog bucks come rollin' in.  According to Iowahawk

after a year or so, he was able to afford an entire 12-pack of Old Style, so there's that.  Okay then, time fo me to go to "work" now, more later, when something of interest occurs.  Drive safely.  Drink milk.